MVC for Dummies

If you are a dummy like me, you may have gone to Wikipedia to figure out the MVC paradigm and left even more confused. The Wikipedia page does a fantastic job of outlining all of the theory surrounding MVC, rather than demonstrating it in a way that dummies understand. The MVC paradigm is used extensively […]

Drunk Japanese Man On the Train

Donk. His head just hit the side of the seats. Somebody had a little bit too much to drink and is now on the floor of the train. With each passing minute, he gets closer and closer to laying sideways down there. He’s not a bum. He’s far from it. He is wearing a Citizen […]

Stranger Requests Pt.3

Correspondence is the act of coming together for oral intercourse, and thereby sharing information and coming to conclusions. Following the AT&T’s advice from the 1980s, I decided to reach out and touch someone for a third time, and that someone whom I wish to speak with would be Sheila Paquette. She has yet to respond […]

Earthquakes

Earthquakes always begin with the creaking joints between the windows. A few noises pop around the room, and it escalates from there. The next thing to happen is the rattling of windowshades and metal. Filing cabinets and desks join in and clatter together. This is when the room comes alive. This is when the plants […]

Kim Jong Il’s Status Downgraded to Kim Jong Dead

With the passing of the Dear Leader due to “overlove of his citizens”, we enter the awkward 3rd age of the Kim dynasty in North Korea. In the beginning, China wanted to give everyone the gift of oppression and got a lot of folks excited over living in drab concrete buildings. Only having recently hopped […]

Portlandia

My hometown only started becoming great after I left. For over a decade I have been away from Portland, and in that time North and Northeast Portland have seen incredible gentrification to the degree that I am now no longer ashamed to admit that I grew up there. North Portland has gotten rid of the […]

Cop Law – Justice Never Stops Coming 5/5

“When a man becomes a cop, they become more than a man – they become a cop.”– Geralt Dubbeldaun, America’s first cop.Truer words have never been spoken, except in part 1, part 2, part 3, and part 4 of the thrilling non-fiction story of Cop Law. This is the fifth and final part of Cop […]

Cop Law – Justice Never Stops Coming 4/5

Originally written as an apology for not meeting my good friend Colin while on vacation, I must now apologize for this apology. Sometimes, the law is too much for people to handle, and they try to ignore it. Little do they know, justice never stops coming. If you don’t read part 1, part 2, andpart […]

Cop Law – Justice Never Stops Coming 3/5

Confucius laid out a system of who deserves the most respect. Confucius lived in a time before cops, so his system was obviously flawed because cops deserve our complete and total compliance. They are the ones that arrest us and make us safe. Learn more about how to admire the police in Part 1 and Part 2. […]

Cop Law – Justice Never Stops Coming 2/5

Part 2 of the 5-part adventure into the world of cops, laws, and Cop Law. Read the action-packed part 1 for a lot of character development that is vital to the storyline. That evening, Dash pulled up to the abandoned factory and saw a number of impressive officers walking in. He took off his bad […]