Cop Law – Justice Never Stops Coming 1/5

Originally written for my good friend Colin as an apology for not meeting up while I was vacationing in Portland, and because Colin loves justice in all its glorious forms, Cop Law is a story about the best cops on the beat – the ones that are so efficient that they find the criminal before […]

Like a Jackass, I Overstayed My Visa

There haven’t been a whole of lot of experiences in my life that I can describe as being “harrowing”, but this certainly is one of them. While many people are amatuer crastinators, I consider myself a pro, but only when it really matters. If we’re talking about getting your work done inside of a company, […]

Stranger Requests Pt.2

Roughly 66% of this site’s readers contacted me in regards to what they had dubbed the “Sheila Paquette Arc“, wondering what had ever come from the mystery caller. The remaining 33% of this site’s readers – me – decided to write Ms. Paquette and figure out what was going on. Slipping off my silken gaming […]

Japanese Summer – A Hatred in Three Parts

Late April 2011 Japan has a lot of things in abundance. Vending machines can be found every couple of blocks. Thousands of shuffling old people block your path, then push you while sprinting toward empty train seats. An army of miniature vans drive around, constantly yelling about garbage removal or trying to garner votes for […]

Introduction to Computing – 1

Computers are not mythical machines, full of loose electricity, held together by magic. They are simple, and you can easily learn about their use and operation. As a child, I always thought that my career would end up being “treasure hunter” after watching the Indiana Jones documentaries. In high school, after hearing the life-shattering news […]

Screen Protectors – Total Waste of Money

A screen protector is a sheet of plastic meant to keep the viewing area of a personal device free of anything that obstructs its view, such as scratches, the user’s fluids, 3rd-party fluids, and dirt. A screen protector is much more readily scratched than an ordinary screen, and also accumulates opaque air bubbles. A screen […]

Stranger Requests

A stranger approaches you and stares at you. They say nothing. You can only assume that they are not retarded. And so, you smile politely back, but it seems as though they want something. This kind of situation has never happened to me in real life, but happens with confusing frequency on social media sites. […]

Shake, Rattle, and Walk – Japan’s Earthquake

The oddest thing happened as we got back home to survey the damage, and were surprised that our surplus of objects on surfaces had survived and surmised that in addition to prayers helping us out, the greatest credit has to go to Japanese engineering.

Shitty Jobs

I hope you eat tiny balls of shit that look like Cocoa-Puffs for the rest of your life.